It started with a simple sandwich making mission.

There I was, playing MK, when all of the sudden, I got hungry as shit. I went to the kitchen to get me a sandwich, and I was attacked.

My mom said there have been flies all over the kitchen for a while now.

I grabbed my electric fly swatter: "The Exocutioner" and began azapping flies. Most went down easily, but that wa not enough, all it did was stun them, when they hit the ground, you had to stomp 'em.

I had a great geuss where they were coming from.

My brothers room.

Which is one of the messiest places on this mutha fucken planet.

As I open the door, BAM, I am bombarded by a thousand flies, I try to run for cover, but in this room, you have to watch your step.


As I work my way around the small abyss, I start to find things I never thought I would see again. My copy of the Terminator, my goddamn Raiden action figure, ya know, the G.I. Joe one. I also discovered I had a long lost sister, wo was born in an emergency (my mom couldn't get to the hospital, so she birthed it in my brothers room) the minute she was born, she was lost forever.

Alright, enough with the lying, back to the real story.

The flies were to much, to fast. They had also evolved, I had to zap 'em 4 times before they would gio down, only in this room, I couldn't find them and stomp them, once they hit the ground, they were lost forever. I had to try and catch 'em as they went down.

One dumb son of a bitch landed on my swatter, and I held the button down.

I should have thought about that first, though, cause then it cooked him and it smelt like shit. Like the most disgusting shit ever. Dont cook flies.

So, I knew if I was going to eliminate these buggers (pun intended, I mean after all, I wrote it, of course I knew it was a pun, and of course it was intended. The minute you write a goddamn pun, and then acknowledge it, it's fucking intended.) I had to find the source.

Unfortunatley, in this room, there were multiple sources. Moldy cups, old pizza boxes, some strange black shit that was all over the place. keep in mind it was hot, too. Heat, Flies, Mess, Smell = I almost died.

After I had killed a good few of 'em, my grandma had gone to the store and gotten bombs (bug bombs) She and my mom walked in and started setting them. The place was gonna blow, and they couldn't see me through the mess (In case you haven't geussed, most of this is bullshit, but the whole room thing is true. You should see it, it's fucking disgusting. It's worse then the movie bitch slap.)

I started running towards the exit, but the thing blew, I started to tear up, I couldn't see, and the smell was enough to make you go mad. (or at least puke.)

Then I realized it was all a dream.










Within a dream.











Within the Matrix

Drive-By appropriate only. Jerrod