sektor seven personal log no. 55.777.66 a samurais death
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sektor seven personal log no. 55.777.66 a samurais death
06/30/2010 07:01 PM EST
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RE: Fan Submission: sektor seven personal log no. 55.777.66 a samurais death
07/10/2010 08:55 AM EST
Man, it shows nobody's reading these and giving appropriate feedback. You don't spell check, your character's a samurai when they don't exist anymore, the battle he fought in is just plain vague, we never get a sense of why he is fighting or having this memory... You need to write more information and you need to spell check. It boggles my mind you can talk about blood "ebbing" yet his sword is "sliceing" things.
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RE: Fan Submission: sektor seven personal log no. 55.777.66 a samurais death
07/10/2010 09:59 PM EST
Personally I think you're a wizard and a true visionary and I read every one of these and eagerly anticipate the next one.

END TRANSMISSION

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RE: Fan Submission: sektor seven personal log no. 55.777.66 a samurais death
07/11/2010 06:39 PM EST
i know however my word program is doing odd stuff like missing misspelled words and deleting words at random areas. its so annoying.furious i will be posting revised virsions if i can. also the whole battle thing will be fully explained in a future submission. also i dont know why you think its mind boggling plz explain.
"If it is alive it can feel pain. If it has eyes it can see it own suffering. If it has blood you can make it bleed. If it has a mouth you can make it scream." Darth i forgot his name. "Thats the best thing about you humans. You bleed." a tarkatan warrior.
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RE: Fan Submission: sektor seven personal log no. 55.777.66 a samurais death
07/13/2010 09:59 AM EST
Sektorseven Wrote:
i know however my word program is doing odd stuff like missing misspelled words and deleting words at random areas. its so annoying.furious
i will be posting revised virsions if i can. also the whole battle thing will be fully explained in a future submission. also i dont know why you think its mind boggling plz explain.

You're relying too much on Word, you can re-read your document yourself and check to make sure the words are written well or not. Read your text out loud as well to get a better understanding on if what you're writing sounds right.
As for the mind boggling part, I mean what you're writing isn't making sense to me. You're using words incorrectly ("ebbing" is reserved for massive tides moving out to sea, hard for that to mix with blood coming out of a body) and misspelling some really easy words that make me question whether or not English is your first language (slicing vs sliceing). It's hard to take your writing seriously with these details and with how little is explained in the "story" you've written.
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RE: Fan Submission: sektor seven personal log no. 55.777.66 a samurais death
07/13/2010 10:44 AM EST
well the reason i used the word "ebbing" in tis context is because alot of people on finfic.net used it in the same context. also the odd slicing word was a spelling error.

i submitted the expalination story to fill the plotholes you pointed out so once is cleared you can read it.

also i learned that once cleared you cant go back and revise them. but i managed to fix word so that it does a better job but also i am trying to read over them. however i have ADHD so it is hard to notice some things. but i am working on it so they will be getting better as time goes on hopefully.
"If it is alive it can feel pain. If it has eyes it can see it own suffering. If it has blood you can make it bleed. If it has a mouth you can make it scream." Darth i forgot his name. "Thats the best thing about you humans. You bleed." a tarkatan warrior.
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