I think there was some discussion about this a while ago. Check out this interview by Marvin Seebum from the November 1995 issue of VideoGames magazine. A link to the scanned image appears at the bottom.
You think all that blood on the Mortal Kombat tournament floors just goes away by itself? Think again. Stan Looth has been scrubbing the guts off Shao Kahn's floor ever since the tournament's humble beginnings in 8,000 B.C. We spoke with the Mortal Kombat janitor in his well-kept boiler room under Shao Kahn's temple of evil. VideoGames: How did you get the job as Shao Kahn's janitor?
Stan Looth: It was like, 10,000 years ago or something, Mac. I was lookin' for work, y'know, sos I stopped by Kahn's place and said, "Ay, you got any work you need done around the temple?" I didn't know back then that he was this all-knowing, sinister overlod. My mistake, right? So he throws me in this pit and makes me fight this stupid lookin' guy with eight arms and no pants. I was pretty angry, y'know? 'Cause, this guy, he's trying to kill me. Sos I grabbed the only weapon I could find: this plunger layin' on the floor. Y'know, those things they unclog toilets with? Which was pretty weird, because flushing toilets didn't even get invented for another 9,800 years. Anyway, I picks up this plunger, and I beat that eight-armed jerk silly. Silly, I'm tellin' ya. He had blood spurtin' out of every limb before I was through with him. So Shao Kahn sees me whippin' this plunger around, and he gets to thinking, "Hey, we got something' here." Sos he tells me he'll spare my soul if I keep the temple clean. Who am I to argue? I mean, the guy's like, this almighty evil sorcerer, right? So I picked up a mop and got to it.
VideoGames: So it's your responsibility to clean up after all those Mortal Kombat fights?
Stan Looth: Lemme tell ya, those guys make one heck of a mess. Intestines, bones, brains, you know. Body parts, all over the place. I usually throw those things in industrial-strength Hefty bag and leave them out on the curb late at night. But the blood, holy mackerel! That's another story. There's gallons and gallons of it, and it don't clean up that easy. There were even a couple of centuries when Kahn had people killin' each other on a white carpet. That was the worst. And this was before they invented these new carpets that you can pour motor oil all over it comes right up. Luckily, most battles these days are conducted on stone or marble surfaces. Those are pretty easy to scrub down, but it takes a lot of bleach and a lot of elbow grease.
VideoGames: You're over 10,000 years old. Most janitors don't make it past 65.
Stan Looth: Yeah, well that's my own fault, y'know? I'm just too darn good at what I do. When I turned 69, I was moppin' up after a particularly nasty battle and I slipped on some blood and whacked the hell out of my noggin. I thought I was a goner, and I was like, "Just let me die, y'know?" I was sick of doin' Kahn's cleanup. But Kahn said I was the best janitor he'd ever had, and he wasn't gonna let me die. Ever. He just smacked me in the head and I was immortal. Boom! Just like that.
VideoGames: Were you upset that weren't featured as a character in the recent
Mortal Kombat movie?
Stan Looth: I spend more time on those tournament floors than any of those turkeys. Liu Kang, Johnny Cage, Kano; all those jerks combined got nothin' on me when it comes to doin' the necessary stuff around that temple. They just come in and do their little fights, and go off to the bars. That's not me, y'know? I'm there cleanin', morning, noon and night. I figure I deserved a little respect for that. So those movie hotshots come to me and say they want me to be played by Alan Thicke. I was like, "Hell, no!" That guy hasn't had a hit since
Growing Pains. So I turned them down, and I'm not in their crummy little movie. So what?
VideoGames: Now that Shao Kahn has taken his tournament into the real world, how have you been keeping busy?
Stan Looth: To be honest, Mac, I've been pretty bored. There's nothin' around here to do except chase rats, and even that's gettin' pretty old. When Shao Kahn punched his way into the real world, I was like, "Take me with you," y'know? I told him I could check out how people are cleanin' stuff these days. Strictly business, y'know? But he told me I had to stay behind and watch the temple. Make sure to replace fuses if they blow and that sort of garbage. Yeah, right. That Kahn's so out of touch, he doesn't even realize his damn temple isn't wired for electricity yet. Now pardon me, I'm a Union man, and it's just about time for my break. I'll see ya 'round, Mac.
To see a scan of the original interview, go here:
http://tabmok99.mortalkombatonline.com/stan_looth_interview.png
