Meet Phil Howard.

At the time of our story, Phil is a Junior in High School. As is normal for Juniors in High School, Phil developed a longing for another Junior in High School, a Junior named Amanda Casey. But there was a dilema here. Amanda wouldn't consider giving Phil the time of day if she came across him dying on the side of the road and his final dying wish was to know the time of the day.

Phil knew this, but he persisted still. All of Phil's efforts, ranging from staring at Amanda from across the room, to smelling her perfume as she walked by, were to no avail. Until one completely arbitrary day, Phil decided it was time to step up his efforts to woo Amanda. He decided to talk to her.

But Phil suffers from a condition, a condition that I'm sure many of you suffer from too. He isn't good at talking to girls. He managed to stumble and stammer his way through a mainly one-way conversation. His final desperate breath in the sinking ship that was his hopes was a phrase that fell from his lips before he could think about it.

"Will you go out with me some time?"

Amanda started. She hadn't seen this coming. And, not being very good at thinking on her feet, she replied, "Yeah, when pigs fly."

Phil was devastated. He trodded back to his house that afternoon, and barricaded himself in his room. From that day on, he had no real reason to hold on to any vestige of his meagre social life. So he studdied. And only studdied. He studdied every free minute of his life, and excelled in school because of this.

The end of High School came, and the came college. Due to his excellent grades, Phil managed to land himself in a rather prestigious college, studying genetic engineering. College went quickly, and due to his excellent grades in college, Phil managed to land a job at a prestigious medical research firm.

For six years, Phil went to work at the medical research firm. No one was ever positive of what he did at work, but everyone, including the higher-ups, assumed it was something important. After all, it was all he did.

Then one day, it had been 10 years since he left High School. And the High School was calling him back. He told himself that this was a perfect opportunity to see his High School friends... what few friends he had.

The night of the High School reunion rolled around. Phil dressed himself up in his finest semi-formal clothes, and headed for the High School gym, where the High School reunion was being held.

The High School reunion was rather uneventful for Phil. The few friends he had in High School had failed to show up to the High School reunion. But the one person he had really wanted to see was there. It was Amanda Casey.

Mustering all the courage he could, he walked up to Amanda, and reintroduced himself. She didn't seem to remember him.

"In our Junior year," he reminded her, "I asked you to go on a date with me. Do you remember what answer you gave me?"

"When pigs fly," she mumbled. She honestly felt bad about how she had acted back in High School. A wicked grin crossed Phil's lips.

"When pigs fly," Phil repeated. Suddenly, a deafening roar filled the air. The doors to the High School gym where the High School reunion was being held burst inward under the force of hundreds of pounds of genetically altered pork. In mere seconds, dozens of ravenous aero-swine decended on the shocked Amanda, tearing her limb from limb and devouring her still warm flesh.

"When pigs fly," he whispered to himself.

Hyuga Wrote: Meet Phil Howard. At the time of our story, Phil is a Junior in High School. As is normal for Juniors in High School, Phil developed a longing for another Junior in High School, a Junior named Amanda Casey. But there was a dilema here. Amanda wouldn't consider giving Phil the time of day if she came across him dying on the side of the road and his final dying wish was to know the time of the day. Phil knew this, but he persisted still. All of Phil's efforts, ranging from staring at Amanda from across the room, to smelling her perfume as she walked by, were to no avail. Until one completely arbitrary day, Phil decided it was time to step up his efforts to woo Amanda. He decided to talk to her. But Phil suffers from a condition, a condition that I'm sure many of you suffer from too. He isn't good at talking to girls. He managed to stumble and stammer his way through a mainly one-way conversation. His final desperate breath in the sinking ship that was his hopes was a phrase that fell from his lips before he could think about it. "Will you go out with me some time?" Amanda started. She hadn't seen this coming. And, not being very good at thinking on her feet, she replied, "Yeah, when pigs fly." Phil was devastated. He trodded back to his house that afternoon, and barricaded himself in his room. From that day on, he had no real reason to hold on to any vestige of his meagre social life. So he studdied. And only studdied. He studdied every free minute of his life, and excelled in school because of this. The end of High School came, and the came college. Due to his excellent grades, Phil managed to land himself in a rather prestigious college, studying genetic engineering. College went quickly, and due to his excellent grades in college, Phil managed to land a job at a prestigious medical research firm. For six years, Phil went to work at the medical research firm. No one was ever positive of what he did at work, but everyone, including the higher-ups, assumed it was something important. After all, it was all he did. Then one day, it had been 10 years since he left High School. And the High School was calling him back. He told himself that this was a perfect opportunity to see his High School friends... what few friends he had. The night of the High School reunion rolled around. Phil dressed himself up in his finest semi-formal clothes, and headed for the High School gym, where the High School reunion was being held. The High School reunion was rather uneventful for Phil. The few friends he had in High School had failed to show up to the High School reunion. But the one person he had really wanted to see was there. It was Amanda Casey. Mustering all the courage he could, he walked up to Amanda, and reintroduced himself. She didn't seem to remember him. "In our Junior year," he reminded her, "I asked you to go on a date with me. Do you remember what answer you gave me?" "When pigs fly," she mumbled. She honestly felt bad about how she had acted back in High School. A wicked grin crossed Phil's lips. "When pigs fly," Phil repeated. Suddenly, a deafening roar filled the air. The doors to the High School gym where the High School reunion was being held burst inward under the force of hundreds of pounds of genetically altered pork. In mere seconds, dozens of ravenous aero-swine decended on the shocked Amanda, tearing her limb from limb and devouring her still warm flesh. "When pigs fly," he whispered to himself.

That had a strange twist