They.... (a poem on the undead)
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posted04/11/2004 01:18 PM (UTC)by
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tgrant
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02/10/2003 04:01 PM (UTC)
They...


Moonlight falls on an empty grave
A foul mist creeps slowly by
That sickening stench fills the air
They’re coming for you
But you don’t know

Mangled feet, carrying dead flesh
Slowly walking, ver silent
They smell fresh blood - It’s your flesh they smell
They’re coming for you
But you don’t know

In your house, they climb the stairs
An eerie silence marks impending doom
Your door creeks, you awaken
They’re coming for you
Don’t be afraid

They walk inside groaning loudly
You look around, there’s nowhere to run
They surround your bed, you hide under cover
They’ve almost got you
Your fate is sealed

Your shaking and your muscles are tense
You can feel their fingers clawing at you
Someone help me please! Go away you demons!
They’ve got you now
Your going to die

Sweat now pours down your face
You call on every ounce of faith
Bu the screams are now your only cry
They’ve got you now
Your demise continues

A ray of hope shines through the window
It’s now their turn to howl in pain
You jump, you kick, you roll out of bed
They’re dying now
But your heart still pounds

Moonlight gone, sunlight reigns
That foul mist can be seen no more
That stench replaced with the sweet scent of life
They’re here no more
You have survived!

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GhostDragon
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"Tis true my form is something odd, But blaming me is blaming God. Could I create myself anew, I would not fail in pleasing you. If I could reach from pole to pole, Or grasp the ocean with a span, I would be measured by the soul, The mind's the standard of the man."
-Isaac Watts
04/07/2004 02:28 PM (UTC)
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A good poem I'd say.

It's interesting that it's not a romanticized view of vampires. You chose to apply a more grotesuqe and morbid tone in your poem.

Hmmmmmm...

How... facinating.

Le Dragon Fantome
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Sub-Zero_7th
04/07/2004 03:21 PM (UTC)
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That's very interesting Tgrant. wink
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M-Scorpion
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No special name edited MK signature, but hey.... I don't give a f00k.

04/07/2004 06:43 PM (UTC)
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My knees started to hurt after i read that sad

Well done T.
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tgrant
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04/07/2004 07:08 PM (UTC)
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M-Scorpion Wrote:
My knees started to hurt after i read that

Well done T.


lmao! Thanks guys! Glad you all liked it!
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queve
04/07/2004 07:12 PM (UTC)
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Simply awesome!!!!

I love that style: Dark adn evil....its simply awesome!

Great job!
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tgrant
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04/07/2004 07:55 PM (UTC)
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queve Wrote:
Simply awesome!!!!

I love that style: Dark adn evil....its simply awesome!

Great job!


Thanks Queve! I think the style is what adds depth to this poem. I'm glad you liked it!
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Redline
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04/07/2004 08:48 PM (UTC)
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That was sweet!
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tgrant
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04/08/2004 09:14 AM (UTC)
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Redline Wrote:
That was sweet!


lol I'm happy you liked it man. Thanks.
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fedegita
04/08/2004 10:29 AM (UTC)
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I like it, it fits very well in with the genre of the undead. Brainssss..... eat brainssssss.......
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Kahn91
04/08/2004 03:51 PM (UTC)
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I LOVE it! If I had some kind of gun under the bed with me, I wouldn't wait until day. I'd go all House of the Dead on them. Oh wait....that would mean I'd have to fight them for a straight 2 FREAKIN' HOURS!!!!!!! And people would find my adventure a bore.
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tgrant
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04/08/2004 08:33 PM (UTC)
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Kahn91 Wrote:
I LOVE it! If I had some kind of gun under the bed with me, I wouldn't wait until day. I'd go all House of the Dead on them. Oh wait....that would mean I'd have to fight them for a straight 2 FREAKIN' HOURS!!!!!!! And people would find my adventure a bore.


lol That could be an alternate ending to the poem. I'm glad you and fedegita liked it!
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DanteThePoetic
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"As soon as someone is identified as an unsung hero, he no longer is"

04/09/2004 11:40 PM (UTC)
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I know you wont take my advice so I'll just tell you how I liked it, I didn't. Not trying to be mean, just some honest input.
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tgrant
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04/10/2004 12:38 PM (UTC)
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DanteThePoetic Wrote:
I know you wont take my advice so I'll just tell you how I liked it, I didn't. Not trying to be mean, just some honest input.


That's cool man . I'm glad you were honest. smile
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Torchia
04/10/2004 05:22 PM (UTC)
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Man, that should be a freakin' song..
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tgrant
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04/11/2004 01:18 PM (UTC)
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torchia Wrote:
Man, that should be a freakin' song..


Thanks alot man! The poem would be pretty eerie as asong. Glad you liked it.
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