I dont let words use me. I grab words by the balls and use them.

"O...k..."

"Shut up."

"Jesus fuck."

"What in the fuck hell?"

"Fatality."

"I don't want to be THAT guy, but..."

"What?"

"No fucking way."

"No."

"Go down the baby dick store, buy yourself a giant bag of baby dicks and eat that bag of baby dicks."

"I hate ______".

"Shitcock!"
"Fuck it! Fuck it with a baseball ball with a rusty nail at the of it and turned sideways!"
"Fucking fuck of ultimate fuck!"

"Fuckcicle "
"Seatbelt Boobage"
"(laughs)" (usually when people say dumb shit)
"BAM!"
"Por Que!?"

oh boy lets see if I can list them all.

God fucking Damnit

What in the hell (in hank hill voice)

fuck fuckity fuck fuck fuck

Son of a...

Jesus Croist!

WTF (yes I say this aloud at times)

So....*strokes chin*

What's up Dog? (speaking to dog, perhaps petting it)

Who's the Furrinest Purrenist? (refering to my cat obviously)

TOASTY! (when I make a mistake, or fart, or make toast)

Damnit Bobby (again with the hank hill.)

Sigh *sad face* (I'm not too happy an individual.)

I believe you have the keys to my...Motor boat HERBERBRBRBR (Richard Nixon voice.)

Big Floppy Donkey Dick

I say dude a lot, even to my dad and females.

"Fuck my life."

"Dude".
"Man."
"Dude, man!"
"Man, dude!"

Thank you. The end.

Like a sombooooooooooooodeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

lol There's plenty of weird, fucked-up shit that come out of my mouth daily like catchphrases...

*drops his keys*
"Fuck me."

*hears something unimportant*
"I don't give two shits."

*friend trying to be witty at my expense*
"I'm about to snap your damn neck."

*person agrees with me*
"I know damn well!"

*person is white*
"____________, nigga!"

*hurts self*
"Motherfuck!"
or
"WHY, LORD?!"

*drops his keys a second time*
"Fuck me sideways."

*person is acting extremely brainless*
"This... this is really happening, isn't it? I'm not dreaming..."

*feels affronted*
"Who the fuck is YOU?"

Among others... I've been told I'm a cartoon character.

lol Wow at some of these. I should steal 'em.

Hmm...

"Sweet."

"Dude!"

"I know, right?"

"Lo siento." (Spanish for "I'm sorry")

"Ay caramba!" (informal Spanish for "holy shit")

"What the hell, man?"

"Look dude, whatever."

"It's whatever, man."

"That's badass, man!"

"[That] kicks major ass!"

"Eat a dick."

"Eat a dick and die."

"Fuck you with a sick dick dipped into a blue waffle!"

Can't really think of anything else right now, but whatever.

"Don't look at me, I didn't do it!"

*studio audience laughs and applauds*

Rather - as in, "I'd rather not."

Bloody - I don't know where I picked this up but I don't like to swear so being American, bloody is not a swear.

"I haven't the foggiest"

"Got Dangit!" - This is a bit of a jab at my Grand father whose from Missouri, when he says God, it sounds like Got.

Oh yeah I say,

'I love how you [do something i don't like]'

FUCK

I been saying that for while now

"Ah, shiotes"
"Chiiilll"
" 'Sup, bro?"
'Puis de la marde"

"You're a non-motherfuckin' factor, bitch"

I usually yell "BAM" randomly at the end of insults to when I make a good point.

for example, the other day a friend insulted my mother. So I said,

"Oh yeah? well your mom's a whore... BAM!"

It's makes every sentence 10x better.

just got a new one,

It's Tuesday, Tuesday, no one gives a shit about Tuesday!

damn that song.

"weird"
"IMO"
any and all emoticons
"well, what have we here?"
"well, SOMEONE'S (doing X), now, aren't they?"
"you can suck a fart out of my ass"
"tittybitch"