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Fan Kreations
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Honestly, this really sucked. 1/10 just for taking the time to type this. There's too much badness to even criticize on. I stopped reading at "Clan Goal: KILL QUAN CHI!!!". It was pathetic, sorry. Next time, get your facts straight (Hanzo Haishi a.k.a. Scorpion was born in Tokyo Japan). Also, make it somewhat realistic.
Yeah it's pretty absurdly bad. I'm sure someone will take their sweet time to make sure you understand WHY it's bad, but honestly to me it's just too hard. It's just really crappy overall. I was asking why you chose the name ''harka'' because it sounds nothing like a japanese name, while Hanzo is pretty japanesey.

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I think that you need to verify your sources before you continue writing, and understand a few things about fanfictions...
Nobody likes it when one doesn't follow what is already established in the canon. For example, Scorpion was NOT born in the Netherealm, he was born on Earth, his parents were not killed by Quan Chi, he is not the leader of the Shirai Ryu... I can go on, but you get the idea.
Another thing to do is when selecting names for characters, do a bit more research for them... Hanzo is a real name, while Harka is probably not, and doesn't even sound like it is Japanese. If that was the name of, say, an alien, then yeah, it'd work, but you're trying to make that a real name, and it's just not working; you're better off using a Japanese name.
As I read this, I couldn't help but feel disappointed. You have to fix your writing up for this board.
Closed at your request.
Nobody likes it when one doesn't follow what is already established in the canon. For example, Scorpion was NOT born in the Netherealm, he was born on Earth, his parents were not killed by Quan Chi, he is not the leader of the Shirai Ryu... I can go on, but you get the idea.
Another thing to do is when selecting names for characters, do a bit more research for them... Hanzo is a real name, while Harka is probably not, and doesn't even sound like it is Japanese. If that was the name of, say, an alien, then yeah, it'd work, but you're trying to make that a real name, and it's just not working; you're better off using a Japanese name.
As I read this, I couldn't help but feel disappointed. You have to fix your writing up for this board.
Closed at your request.
Pages: 1
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