You guys think this would have worked as a thread? I wrote it up a few weeks ago as some sort of satirical policital rant, but decided not to post it anywhere. The sentiments kinda gone now, so I munna throw it up here real fast, kay?:
Darklord_Xel Never Ever Wrote:
Dear Earth,
So, everyone on Earth hates Americans, right? Well, good. You should. We suck. But, remember, we hated us first. We started hating America from the moment it was brought into existance. We've had war, murder, riots, etc. all because Americans hated America.
Now we look at you guys out there. We look at all the other countries who say that they hate us.
Posers.
We've hated us LONG before you did.
LONG before we started shipping over over businesses, our entertainment, and whatever else.
LONG before out major corporations took out huge amounts of stock in your companies.
LONG before our culture and lifestyles leaked into yours.
And LONG before you started trying so fucking hard to be us.
You play our video games, you watch our movies, you eat at our fast food places. And now, as always, you hate us. Ever the fucking copycats. Always trying to be the little brother to Big Brother America.
Oh, and the best part is, you don't think we know. You think that we think the world loves America. You think that just because you spend trillions of dollars on our stuff, that we think you like us. We don't.
Now, we like you guys. Because, hell, you guys pay big cash to suckle on America's tit. And we like to go into your foreign places and see just how much we can get away with and just how inferior you are to us.
Ever wonder why rich Americans vacation in scenic places like Australia and Brazil? The atmosphere? No. The people? No. The McDonalds? Hell yeah. We like seeing just how much America owns the Earth, and how much theres nothing you can do about it.
We know you hate us. But we also know that, without us, you've got absolutely nothing.
Nothing at all.
Isn't reality fun, kids?
......
Just kidding. Most Americans are Liberty Bell-humping idiots and noone here knows you hate us. Shh...Don't tell them, though. If they live in their American Jesus-induced fantasy world long enough, Canada might be able to invade us and this place won't suck any more ^_^. Fingers crossed, people. -_^
That was really long for the Drive-By wasn't it? Oh well. -_-
