I once said "I'm an atheist for Christ's sake."

"I'm not racist, but..."

This sorry Sid

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m4O-wDli0S4

One of the dumbest things I'd ever heard was a few years back:

Customer suing Mcdonald's for making them fat...

Guy 1: "You know the best way to play Russian Roulette?"

Guy 2: "No, what is it?"

Guy 1: "You but 5 bullets in the chamber and leave one empty. PERFECT FOR YOUR ENEMIES lololo"

Guy 2: "Damn, 5/6? That's like a 50/50 chance of gettin shot!"

There's a Super-Christian in my first period who believes science (such as carbon dating and the sun's eventual explosion) and evolution is bullshit, and that dinosaurs couldn't possibly be 150 million years old because humans weren't around then.

She almost cried when I told her all the reasons that was stupid.

"Glenn Beck is a visionary"

Lil' Wayne's lyrics.

me: OOOOHH (insert freinds name) *deep creepy voice*

(freind):what?!?

*friend continues talking on phone with girlfriend*

me: WE HAVEN'T USED THE SLIP'N SLIDE YET *creepy deep voice*

friend to girlfriend: why are you laughing?!?

man that road trip to DC was fun...

Dumbest thing I've ever heard? That the rescue workers who helped on 9/11 have to be background checked against a terrorist watchlist before receiving medical benefits for the injuries/cancers they got from working at Ground Zero.

That's not dumb...that's truly fucked up. Wow, gotta love the gratitude.

"Thanks for saving people's lives, guys! Now bend over...."

You should see Jon Stewart's "Friends Without Benefits" rant. But I digress.


Awhile ago, my family and I were walking by a Peruvian restaurant. My youngest sister asked me, "Where is Peruvia?"

I had a friend in college who had celebral palsy, and she said some people didn't want to be her friend because they didn't want to "catch" CP !!!! Maybe she shouldn't hang out with them because she might catch a bad case of stupidity.

This one is from a George Carlin skit and it’s so true

“...Some people are real fuckin' stupid. You ever notice that, how many stupid people you run into? Goddamn there's some stupid bastards out there. Carry a pad and pencil with you, you'll come up with twenty names by the end of the day. Think about this; think about how stupid the average person is, and then realize that half of 'em are stupider than that.”

Couldn’t have said it better myself. I love you George you’re the man.

First- I had a customer who was going to buy some topsoil ask if there was a garuntee that weeds wouldn't grow in dirt.

Second- There was also this lady who was buying a shrub:

Lady:"If it dies can we bring it back?"

Me:"Yeah it'll be warrantied for a year."

Lady:"I don't want to know if it comes with a warranty I want to know if I can bring it back if it dies."

Third- And lastly was a customer who wanted me to explain to him why trees don't grow sideways.

Customer service jobs are the best.

By chance, do you work at Home Depot in the seasonal department? Sounds familiar from when I worked there..lol I agree..customer service ANYWHERE would top this thread.

Mine would have to be when my girlfriend at the time forgot my birthday and tried to cover it up by saying she was celebrating it, she went out for my birthday.. lol She really did but she went out with friends and at the time future boyfriend

Brutal.

I worked at a natural grocery/vitamins store and this woman came up to me. She told me she was making a salad and didn't know what to put in it.

You guys should check the website "Not always Right", there's tons of customer service stories like these.

This was so stupid, I had to get a screen-capture on it and respond. Great idea to post a wish list in the NRS FB page expecting serious consideration!

I saw a woman complaining about people with bad grammar and her post was full of grammar errors.

Lol I remember that just like how this lady used her microwave to 'dry' her dog from washing it and sued the microwave company for not having a warning label to not dry animals in the microwave.

"instead anything that was said in Jersey Shore"

Have to definitely agree with you on Lil Wayne's lyrics lol. Heres how one of his lines goes *Hello motha fucka, hey how you durrr, it's Weezy.F Baby come to take a shit and urine on your toilet bowel bitches." Now tell me how this guy ever got signed as a rapper with these kind of lyrics. Oh now I know, It must be how stupid the public is with their taste of music.

Haha, wow... Shockingly you saw that on Facebook. Most of the time, comments like that you only see on Youtube. And my goodness, do people not get it half the time.

I get asked that so often, I couldn't help it.