" Why is there a big brain behind me? And how come I have this yellow thing sticking out of my head? And what the heck happened with the REST of my body....?! "

3rd: Now if that pic had Jessica Simpson's brain, it would just look like unused blueprint


2nd: Doctor: Nurse, will you please tell Dr. Kindrak one last time that if he wants to play with our new highliters, he's just going to have to use the coloring books in the waiting room like all of the other children.


And 1st:

Hannibal: Ok ive devided up this brain for lunch. I get the bottom bit.
Nameless Psycopath: Awww how come i get the smallest piece?
Hannibal: Because and your not as good at eating brains as me, plus the guy that i got it from said i could have the bigger half.

SAIRUS: 1
Olympic_hero: 1
Cufferellius: 1

Caption, caption on the wall, which is the funniest of all?

PWNED by the Artist formery know as "Artest".

Son of a **** stole my weed i i i mean ball

NOT captured by the camera: Artest & Croshere gently holding hands.

White Men Can't Jump.

Artest: Damn it, that doesn't look anything like a bird (slaps hand away). Sit down, it's my turn to make a shadow puppet.

3rd: White men can't jump.

2nd: Son of a **** stole my weed i i i mean ball!
















And 1st: PWNED by the Artist formery know as "Artest".


SAIRUS: 1
Olympic_hero: 1
Cufferellius: 1
ShingoEX: 1

Capt. Captions, now with extra humor:

LOL, ShingoEX. Nice.

Performing the Heimlich maneuver:
1. form fist below choking victim's ribcage and clasp with other hand.
2. using both arms, pull inward and upward, repeating every five seconds, to expel obstruction.
3. if still choking, bludgeon victim mercilessly with a mace in the back of the head.
4. Repeat steps 2 and 3 with more force until airway is clear or loss of life occurs.

Quick do the KAI-mlich manouver.
or
Caught in a sudden storm, need an umbrella? Sometimes you just gotta improvise.

(damn, these both suck!lol)

"Before you die, you must know you are now carrying my child..."

While Kai and Quan Chi are fighting on top of a roof, the rain begins to weaken the building:

Kai: Oh crap, there's too much weight on the roof, it's beginning to fall
Quan Chi: Damnit what should we do?
Kai: Lets get rid of all the stuff we dont need.
Quan Chi: Okay
Kai: Throws heavy boulders over the top, and he pulls out his mace to throw over
*Quan Chi grabs Kai from behind*
Quan Chi: We don't need useless characters like you in MK
Kai: Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

Fatality

Quan: " Man, drop some weight. You're pretty fat. "

I told u to use a fork and knife to to eat.... you always end up choking!!

OR:

Kai: Sory baby... service has bbeen slow tonight...
QUAN: I AM gonna havfe to choke a bitch

"And now, Ladies and Gentleman, Quan Chi and Kai will attempt to perform a double triple axle in the 2004 National Ice Skating Championship."

Quan Chi: "Ok, NOW can you see the moon behind that mountain??? And eat yer damn lolly! "

Kai: (Ok ive got two choices, 1 i let him throw me off the roof or i let go of my mace so it will hit him in the head and then i can send him off the roof? mmmmmm what to do?)
Quan Chi:(I hope he doesn't drop that mace)
Kai: Umm i think ill drop the mace.

As the mace falls slowly towards Quan Chi's face Kai looks back in unexpected glory, but as the Quan Chi falls to the ground he throws Kai off the roof, ending both pitiful lives.

Kai: Damn i should have told him i loved him sooner.
Quan Chi: Why am i forced tolive without my love, WHY???????

You like that dont you

Sarcasm Wrote: You like that dont you

Umm, did Sarcasm lend Gunther his computer?

No NO nO no No no no i hope i didnt he could have got me drunk. it will remand a mystery, but y does my ass hurt???

MKSECRETS Wrote: Umm, did Sarcasm lend Gunther his computer?

3RD: Kai: Sory baby... service has bbeen slow tonight...
QUAN: I AM gonna have to choke a bitch


2ND: Performing the Heimlich maneuver:
1. form fist below choking victim's ribcage and clasp with other hand.
2. using both arms, pull inward and upward, repeating every five seconds, to expel obstruction.
3. if still choking, bludgeon victim mercilessly with a mace in the back of the head.
4. Repeat steps 2 and 3 with more force until airway is clear or loss of life occurs.















And 1st:



While Kai and Quan Chi are fighting on top of a roof, the rain begins to weaken the building:

Kai: Oh crap, there's too much weight on the roof, it's beginning to fall
Quan Chi: Damnit what should we do?
Kai: Lets get rid of all the stuff we dont need.
Quan Chi: Okay
Kai: Throws heavy boulders over the top, and he pulls out his mace to throw over
*Quan Chi grabs Kai from behind*
Quan Chi: We don't need useless characters like you in MK
Kai: Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

Fatality


SAIRUS: 1
Olympic_hero: 1
Cufferellius: 1
ShingoEX: 1
Alpha_Q_Up: 1



Captions are like the 1933 Ford, they go 0 to 60 in 3 days:

"Guinness Record For The Biggest Orgasm In A Threesome"

"5 dollah fo evweting... but fo you, your sord be too beeeeg!"

i tried to re-create that comment in full metal jacket, but its not fully coming to me

"Hello Village whore. My friend here stuck his dick into one of these pearls and now he's slowly turning a darker shade of blue every hour. Ain't that something?"