Meh. I didn't laugh.

Okay, here's one: What did George W. Bush say when asked his opinion on Rowe vs. Wade?

He said, "I think I'll row, I don't want to get my feet wet."

A woman visits a holistic doctor and asks him to cure her migraines. He tells her, “When you get a headache, repeat out loud, ‘I don’t have a headache,’ over and over.” She tries this, and it works.

The next day the woman has her husband see the same doctor to treat his impotence. He comes home from the appointment and drags his wife to the bedroom, then jumps on top of her and says, “You are not my wife, you are not my wife ”

SirManny111 Wrote: A woman visits a holistic doctor and asks him to cure her migraines. He tells her, “When you get a headache, repeat out loud, ‘I don’t have a headache,’ over and over.” She tries this, and it works. The next day the woman has her husband see the same doctor to treat his impotence. He comes home from the appointment and drags his wife to the bedroom, then jumps on top of her and says, “You are not my wife, you are not my wife ”

^best one yet!!!

sorry, but i dont have any jokes as of yet, but when i get them, i'll post them.

I didn't catch the third joke seriouly.remember guys don't look for jokes on the internet podt your own joke please and lets see who is the funniest.

here's one,
A woman goes to the doctor and says doc, you have to help me, me and my husband can't stop having kids, what do we do? the doc says have you ever heard of condoms? she says no?..whats that? the doctor says well, you put it on the organ before you have sex, try that and come back in a few months. the lady coms back to the doctor's office in a few months, she's pregnant, the doc says what happened? she says we didn't have an organ so we put it on the piano.

I field medic in Iraq discovered two badly injured and unconscious men, one of them an American soldier and the other an Iraqi insurgent.

When the American came to in the hospital, the medic asked him what happened.

"Well, we ran into each other in battle and instinctively aimed our guns at each other, daring the other to move. Slowly, he said in English, 'George Bush is an asshole.' Then I said 'Well, Saddam Hussein is an asshole.'"

"Then what?" asked the medic.

"Well, we were standing in the road shaking hands when the truck hit us."

lol

So a guy walks into a bar.....keep up now.....and says,"OUCH!!!!"

GET IT?!?!?!?!?! He WALKED into a Bar....hahaha!

Ok.....Ill Shut up know......

Black_Dragon Wrote: So a guy walks into a bar.....keep up now.....and says,"OUCH!!!!" GET IT?!?!?!?!?! He WALKED into a Bar....hahaha! Ok.....Ill Shut up know......

I was about to say that one. Damn, you beat me to it.

Best joke so far is, Author-DOCBROWN

scorpion15152004 Wrote: Best joke so far is, Author-DOCBROWN

I have one that is similar.

What is better than roses on your piano?

Tulips on your organ.

Tha's the worst joke so far takermk.lol

Two tall trees, a birch and a beech, are growing in the woods. A small tree
begins to grow between them, and the beech says to the birch, "Is that a son
of a beech or a son of a birch?" The birch says he cannot tell. Just then
a woodpecker lands on the sapling. The birch says, "Woodpecker, you are a
tree expert. Can you tell if that is a son of a beech or a son of a birch?"
The woodpecker takes a taste of the small tree. He replies, "It is neither a
son of a beech nor a son of a birch. It is, however, the best piece of ash I
have ever put my pecker in. Not exactly my joke but its a friend of mines.

That joke started off fine but you should of let the woodpecker insulted one of them,so therefore it got third place.

*told outside*

Knock Knock

Who's There?

DO YOU SEE A DOOR?????

One day there were two women hunting, a blonde and a brunette. They were walking along hunting, looking around when suddenly the brunette just collapses. The blonde rushes over to her and tries to get her to respond, nothing happens. So the blonde gets on her cell phone and calls 911. The dispatcher picks up and says "911 whats your emergency?" The blonde says "I think my friend is dead!" The dispatcher says "ok you need to make sure she's dead," the blonde says ok and puts down the phone. A couple seconds later there are two shots fired. The blonde runs back to the phone and says.."OK now what"?

Theres a blonde and a brunnete in an elevator, and there's a white residue on the wall. The blonde asks "is that a cum stain?" The brunette goes over, sniffs it, and says "yep its a cum stain." The blonde goes over and licks it and says "Hmmm nope, its no one from this building"

A priest, a rapist, and a pedaphile walk into a bar, now that's just the first guy.

One word Joke People.... Stryker.

A girl walks into a bar and asks the bartender "Where's the little girls room?", to which he responds,"Right down the hall on the left".A preist rather excited walks up to him and asks,"Is there a little boys room too!!!!!!!

oh give up on the priest jokes, we've heard them all before!

A Mexican guy, a black guy and a white guy are walking a come across a magic lamp. So the rub it and out come a genie saying hell grant each of them 1 wish apiece. The Mexican says "I want all of my people to be happy and go back to Mexico". So the genie grants his wish. The black guy asks "I want all my people happy and send them back to Africa". The genie grants his wish. So the white guy says "You’re telling me all the blacks and Mexicans are out of America, ill take a coke."

great jokes georgebrown and SirManny111.

George Bush falls asleep in the oval office one night. He wakes up, and before him stand the spirits of three great presidents past--George Washington, Thomas Jefferson, and Abraham Lincoln.

To Washington, he humbly asks: "What can I do to become a better president?"

"Lower taxes for the middle and lower classes," he says, then POOF, he is gone.

"President Jefferson, what can I do to become a better president?"

"You must give the state governments more freedom to create their own laws," he says, and POOF, he is gone.

"President Lincoln, what can I do to become a better president?"

Lincoln thinks for a moment, then slowly he says "Go see a play."