Granted, but it plays and looks like Street Fighter 2 the movie the game, thus making it unplayable.

I wish they would remake the dollar bills.

Granted, however they just took away my pennys so your ass should be happy

I wish the president of the United Stated was white

Granted! It turns out it was make-up all along, leading to a sharp decline in the faith of Democrats, ushering in a new age for Republicans, who bring the US into higher debt, lower school scores with new bills to dumb down science, less jobs for the middle class, and an eventual call-up for the entire debt to be paid to the the rest of the world. The US is dissolved by the countries it owes money to, with half the country now belonging to China.
I wish I was a published author.

Granted! But all of your books are teen vampire romance novels that seem erotic to 35% of teenage girls, and stupid o everyone else.

I wish for a small raindrop to drop somewhere in Africa. Normal, H2O raindrop.

Granted but it was there last one they ever get and Africa become wasteland with no human life there.

I wish I had moves like Jagger

Granted, but the raindrop falls onto the nose of an already angered lioness, and the irritation of the raindrop sends her into a roaring rampage, charging into villages and cities all across North Africa, killing anyone she sees along the way.


I wish the pickle.

GRANTED! But said pickle belongs to Randolph Hitler, and you get his "pickle".

I wish for A new oak tree to sprout in tha-e Amazon, where nobody will EVER no it just appeared. Also, it is 30 feet tall, and 4 feet wide, and is but a simple oak.

Granted, but you now have a face like Jagger as well. :(

and other wish, granted, but the tree soon becomes overrun with termites, and withhin a week it's as if it was never there.


I wish Justin Bieber was never born.

Granted. He spawned out of your penis as a sperm infected with female hormones and painfully ripped through your urethra into the world, where YOU are the cause of this awful monstrosity!

I wish I didn't have that image in my head...

Granted, it is replaced by the image of it coming out of YOUR penis

I wish these swagfags would jump into an active volcano on an uncharted island.

I'd not corrupt that wish, whoever grants it.

Granted, but you suddenly end up becoming one as well, and you jump into the volcano with the rest of them.


I wish I was dead. (I really don't, I just want to see how this gets corrupted.)

Granted, all of your emotions and mind become completely and utterly detached from your life and everything in this plane of existence, allowing your mind to transcend the limits of human thought and feeling.

However, you still exist on this planet, without a single care for what fate occurs or befalls upon you. Essentially making you "dead" to the inhabitants of the planet Earth and yourself, as you relish in your elevated perspective of life and reality.

This Earth, as you find, is a very beautiful world, though humans have perverted and corrupted it with their lust, greed, and selfishness.

Death is the only escape from this madness, and yet, your transcendence does not allow you to let go.
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I wish ice cream cones filled with various flavors of ice cream would fall from the clouds during the raining season.

Granted, they fall with the pointed side facing down and kill everyone outside.

I wish I had a recurve bow that never breaks and shoots perfectly.

granted but your arms fall off when using it once

I wish I was called Joey Joe Joe Jr. Shabadoo

Granted, but you are only known as that when you're being gangbanged by morbidly obese old men.

I wish I could breath underwater

granted but the only water you can breath in is mixed with piss.

I wish I could lift Thor's hammer.

Granted, but as soon as you do, Thor commands it back, and the hammer speeds off, taking your arm with it.


I wish I had highly advanced telepathy.

granted you never made a wish.

I wish Goro released a work out dvd

Granted, but it doubles as a porn film, and you find it strangely arousing, ruining your perception of human sex forever.
I wish I had 1 000 000 000$.

Granted, here are your billion dollar signs.

$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$


I wish Alf was back on the air

Granted, but it blows away in the wind

I wish I had a free, legal, working copy of the new Tomb Raider game that came out today on PS3

Granted! However, Tomb Raider enthusiasts catch wind of this and rob you to get the game.
I wish we had less pollution on Earth.

That's really not so bad, I like Psyduck.




Granted, but all the pollution the does exist is in your house.


I wish my music professor would stop cancelling our classes.