Granted but all classes are about gangnam style and harlem shake

Wish I can go Disney land

Granted but when you get there it's closed.

I wish I could grow the most manly beard in the history of man.

Granted, but it's so manly that other men kill you out of jelousy

I wish I had a bunch of Wii ISOs to use with Dolphin...

Granted, but since I don't know what you mean by Dolphin, your Wii is going to have to explode. Sorry.

I wish I could thank musician Kamran Tondar, a.k.a. Kamran Thunder, for giving me the inspiration I needed to start composing Hawkgirl's theme. Funny thing, he actually gave a lecture in my Music 121 class a few weeks ago.

Granted, but upon thanking him, he gets peeved at you for getting so affected by im and not being original.

I wish that E3 was here next month already.

Granted but it just big E3 standing there

I wish next person (and that person only) who grant my wish, something bad happeneds

Granted, I get kidnapped, but Liam Neeson saves me.

I wish I could do a vocal impression of Morgan Freeman (as in the 75 year old actor that starred as Lucius Fox in Christopher Nolan's Dark Knight Trilogy, and narrated March of the Penguins).

Granted, but the impression of him is one where he has bronchitis in a severe case, and your voice permanently gets scarred by it.

I wish the PS Vita wasn't such a super-taco to me.

Uh...granted but it explodes?


I wish I knew what that meant...

Granted, unfortunately, you now can't get the image out of your head

I wish always-online DRM would go away

Granted but none of the games work

I wish for KUNG FU monkey

Granted, but it's a Kung fu monkey that kicks your ass.

I wish my facial hair didn't grow back so fast.

Granted. It now takes 50 years for any of your facial hair to grow.

I wish that it snowed forever.

Granted, it snows forever... on your house.

I wish that bitch would!

Granted, but it's not pretty. She actually the whole thing and everything gets even more screwed up from there.


I wish I liked fish.

Granted, but fish like you too and they attempt to gang rape you whenever you're near them


I wish I was a fairy

Granted, but you cant join the army. (If you know what i mean)



I wish i could kill George Clooney, that smug bastard.

Granted, you kill George Clooney, the smug bastard from that one television program that aired in the year 2059, using the firearm of your choice.

I wish planet Earth would drift around the galaxy, maybe even other galaxies in our Universe, through an Improbability Drive. And through that Imp. Drive, Earth would be self-sustaining without the Sun or the Moon, and that no anomalous object from space, alien species, terrorist organization, corrupted powers, rioting humans, deliquent kids, or lazy management would cause the eventual destruction of the Earth as it drifts through the stars.

Granted, but the Imp. Drive malfunctions, sending every living being on the planet into a black hole while the planet goes somewhere else unharmed.

I wish I had a pocket watch that worked perfectly.

Granted, but it's inhabited by evil spirits that do sexual things to you in your sleep.


I wish the MKO emoticons got updated.

Granted, but the quality of these updated emoticons is so great you have to pay $1.99 - Debit only, MasterCard and Visa accepted - every time you use one to cover the cost.

I wish Topsy didn't have to get zapped by Thomas Edison. Yes, I watched Bob's Burgers last night.

Granted, but this is only because Nikola Tesla was never born. Meaning our world now lacks everything created by his genius.


I wish you had a cheese sandwich

Granted, but i eat it with my mouth open and spray spittle on you


I wish the world would bleed........!

Granted- we all bleed Swedish Fish, and you get none!

I wish for Termites to infest the asshole and house of my GCA Assistant Principal.

Granted! They come after you next!
I wish the ski conditions were a lot better for skiing at Cypress.